This One’s Gonna Take a While


I know I haven’t been very good with my blog lately, it has been holiday, and the beer has been flowing freely. There was also a wedding, mead, way more brewing and some other junk.

Caroline and I are now legally, actually married! I even got a new ring after I may have possibly, through no fault of my own, lost my first one… Nevermind that though.
My new ring is silver, and pretty darn unique. When it was given to me, it had large ridges shaped from a finger print – it was very wide and uncomfortable. I took it to a chap in town to have it flattened and made smaller (too small, it turned out), and the end result is this.
IMG_20160111_105241For the moment, it sleeps hanging from my neck. I will eventually get it enlarged, but honestly, I think around my neck is a far safer place. I’m not very good with rings on fingers apparently.

So. The papers are all signed and filed.

Crowded around the big, fat desk in the family home, we signed away our souls to much fanfare. We decided to sign the postdated document on the 27th, coinciding with the anniversary of the grandparents, which is nice, I’m told. It was convenient and all that, too, but that’s beside the point!

Now, I’m not one for ceremony, or photos, or physical contact, or socialising, or people in general, or any of that kind of stuff that apparently comes with an occasion like mawwiage… Everybody else does. What (if it was up to me) should have taken about 20 minutes… took over an hour, with plenty of tears, and *shudder* hugs, and awkward photos which will ‘be forever’.


On the other hand, we did dress up for the occasion!

So, since we were legally married, we needed to start planning our wedding, which was to take place on the 8th of January. I know what you’re thinking… ‘Did you really need to plan things so far in advance?’ I didn’t think so, but I also don’t get much of a say with this kind of thing.

I had been doing my part, though. Over the past 4 months or so, the forest clearing had been cleared and its terraces terraced. The steps down had been dug out, and the path widened. My mead was also ready, and a new batch of beer was brewing in its place, so my work was done. I even designed the program!

Now, there had been some worry leading up to the wedding. The clever people over at The Internet foretold of light rain and showers for most of the day before the wedding…. which would have been perfect! Cool everything down, and make everything fresh and sparkly and junk.
What we got instead, the day before our wedding, was a mild flooding. As in, our shiny new 4 x 4 got stuck.
IMG-20160107-WA0003Even the recruited man x 4 almost got stuck trying to get it out…
We didn’t make it down to the clearing to see how it had faired because we didn’t feel like swimming through our new crocodile and swamp-man infested bog. We couldn’t even make it out of our drive way without help (thank you, Seanya).

We didn’t get married in the bog-forest.

Instead, we very gloomily made our way to Bergen – the home of that big, fat desk, to think over and organise a new way to assemble The Franoline. Thankfully, Bergen is pretty, and comes equipped with people! At least two of which are events organisers (one used to be a wedding organiser), so things weren’t looking so bleak.

In short, Caroline and I ended up getting married in a car port!

Ok, wait. Maybe I should elaborate a bit.

Bergen is Caroline’s family’s holiday home here in Wilderness Heights. It’s secluded up in the wee mountains overlooking the village down below and the beach just beyond that. The closest neighbor in view is across the valley, which is filled with dense forest, monkeys, baboons, buck, leopards, and a disturbing amount of bones.

DSC_0088The carport in question is actually a deck which looks over the valley, and the rest of the property. Cars just somehow end up under there…. nobody really knows how.

Back to the wedding and stuff…

After the Van Den Berg machine got through with it, it looked like a whole bunch of wedding wrapped in marriage! I was even involved! There are photos to prove it!
12439542_10156438715295215_6868468949660559709_nI’m probably the guy pretending to hold the ladder.

My mead (which was really the whole point of the wedding) was pretty darn cool. I had waited over two months to get to enjoy it, and oh did I enjoy it. We decorated wine goblets with wire and beads (mine were mostly wire, and a bit of wood) for each person to keep. Each couple also got a whole bottle of mead to age for a year that hopefully won’t explode all over their cupboard.
12509125_10156438712325215_340901678624893190_nIt’s glorious!

We got given a pair of wooden mortar and pestles which I carved away at, and drilled, and sanded an actual, drinkable lip into. Which is awesome. They have yet to be sealed, but they are Teak wood, so pretty good already.
The lack of sealing actually worked out pretty well – the wood is now stained with the colour of the mead and champagne that was drunk on the day, and once I do actually seal it, that will be sealed in, too.

We are now planning our honeymoon, which is a tour of the various mountain passes and the several microbreweries in the area, including the meadery in town that I still haven’t been to! I would really like to see how my mead is up against ‘actual’ mead, which I’ve never had before.


I’m sure I’ve missed out a bunch, but I am pretty out of practice with this whole blogging thing.

I’ll end off with a thank you to all the people who pitched in so much with our little wedding. It may not have been in my forest, but it was still perfectly adequate! It was a shame that we were kept away from it by the photographer, but apparently the photos will be nice, I’m told.

P.S: My new years resolution is to stick with my new years resolutions.


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